We were seated just outside the door of ARG... he was with his mom... and that he does not look good with the mask and all... he looked at me... I smiled at him... but I must admit, I was quite hesitant... well, you have to understand that he really looked sick and well, I'd be risking myself... plus, what do I know... what would I say... anyhow, people from ARG saw that he was really sick and they have him lay down and that his mom started talking to me... So, it was really his mom that I knew... she told me how much she have suffered seeing her son go through what he was going, and how willing she was to fight more for her son...
I promised her that things are going to be okay... or at least, things are going to be better... and that I remember telling her to look around and that she saw that there is hope... that the other people who were there don't look sick at all, and that one day, her son would be like them one day... I promised her that...
It was really funny then, because I don't know what my number is... and that I wanted to give him my number for him to have someone to talk to... so instead, I gave him my twitter account, and thinking, at least, if he had questions, there would be some other pozzies that may answer and that he would have other pozzie friends...
That was the most that I could do, be a promo girl... hahahahahahaha... I know I could do better and that I should do better... but that time... I can only be a poster guy...
Days came and went... never heard of him... or so I thought...
I get my ARV refill every 3 months... and so, almost 3 months later, I was back at ARG... and there they were again... He was looking better... not yet good but better... her mom said he was doing better and though tired was very optimistic about things...
Mom was tired, she dozed off seating there as we wait for our turn... and that we chatted... I mentioned to him about the twitter... telling him that he must... to gain friends and have someone to talk to... and that I was armed with a smart phone... blackberry torch... and that I showed him my wall... and that apparently, he was in twitter too... and that he was following me...
And that he actually tried to hit on me... after he asked me to hand a note to someone at ARG... like really, com'on!!!
I was not really fond of him... I thought his equation seemed correct but for some reason, I find it so wrong... and that I was at a lost with him... but then again, I guess that was the whole idea of me wanting him on twitter, so if I couldn't handle him, someone could... and that I let him be and just thought he is a kid... 21, I think... you are still a kid at 21... don't you dare think otherwise... you think you know what life is about at that age... but no...
I did note in his twits about him blacking out and that he suffers from great head aches and vision loss... but I was not paying much attention to it... I also noted that he was being tested for Lupus... I don't know what Lupus is... I think Ferdinand Marcos died of lupus... but not really familiar with it... I did note... but I was not paying much attention... well, I have a life to tend to and that I really don't think i could do much...
Mayhaps... I could have visited him at the hospital... but... I don't know...
And then, the twit came... one have fallen... and it was him...
Really, perhaps there was nothing that I could do... perhaps I could have been there for him and his mom... I bleed for his mom... she had so much hope and was to fight for him... I promised her things are going to be okay... at least, better... much better...
Well, I was thinking last night... He is in a better place... and that at some point, I envied him... it's done... it's over... he is now resting... no more pain... no more worries... no more disappointment... unlike us, we are left to fight... stand up when we fall on the ground... live with disappointment and blows of life... hurting our families... our mothers... hoping against all hope... praying to at least get use to it than things getting better...
He is in a far better place now... he is at the best...
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