not yet +

Perhaps your thinking, since the last entry was me saying I am to finally to go to RITM (Research Institute for Tropical Medicine) to take the HIV test... That indeed I tested positive and that I am all depressed and so I have not been updating...

Well, guess what, I have not been to RITM... yet... hmmmm...? Why not, I have no idea...

I will admit if I were scared, it is perfectly normal to be scared. And, I am... But, it's not that... it is more of... I am from Pasig, near Marikina... and RITM is way over in Alabang... I don't even know where Alabang is... how to get there...

So here I am... still with everyday fever dispite the antibiotic I was prescribed by Dr. Ditangko and worst... You see, I lost appetite... But I know I have to eat... So, I force myself to eat... I command myself to eat... and that I eat... But since, I got home from the hospital... for some reason, I vomit everything I eat... I tried to keep it down, and I could... but the problem with that is that it makes me feel light headed and dizzy... then it triggers a fever...

So after vomitting, I end up eating some crackers instead so I can take my medication...

I really don't know what to do anymore... perhaps, I really need to go to RITM already and take the test and if I turn out to be positive, they will give me some medication to strenghten my immune system and thus taking care of whatever this is that is causing my fever...

I don't know... I really just want to give up... well, I have been to the doctors, I was prescibed medications, I took the medications and follow the instruction carefully and still here I am... I lost my appetite, I force myself to eat... I force myself to eat but I vomit everything I eat...