Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Page 31 of 366

8:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs, 18 left/6 days to go. ARV: zido/lami

Interestingly, the pungent taste caught in my tongue brought back memories... She was one terror principal... during elementary.... can't remember what grade I was then... I was too young back then... she, the principal, expertly put that small... tiny... roll of cotton... into that cavity in a tooth inside my mouth, which was causing me so much distress... 

We learned it from our mom... mom was feeling all guilty for not being home to take care of me... I felt I had no choice... I wanted to be hugged, be in an embrace to calm me down and bare the pain... my brother's would do... but it was out of his capability... he rather, as I was in agony, played Plant Vs Zombie on my laptop... insensitive bastard, I thought... I had no one, I want my mom... at least, just to hear her voice... I try not to... I felt I have no choice... I called her...

Toothache Drops, my mom said.

198 pesos...

The smell, almost unbearable...

Dip a small cotton on the solution... and place the cotton to fill in the cavity of the tooth...

The taste was as unbearable...

It contains chlorobutanol, creosote and oil of cloves... all three are antiseptics... widely use for medical preservation...

It was effective...

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

Monday, January 30, 2012

Page 30 of 366

8:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs, 21 left/7 days to go. ARV: zido/lami

uy... may nagbasa ng blog ko... hahahahahahahahahaha! at mega comment siya... 

reply ako... pero lintik (excuse my language but they deserve it!) na Globe Broadband (okay lang, di naman me bayad, si pinsan) paputolputol signal... tipong ano 'to, prepaid cellphone call, palaging drop call!?! Ang haba nung reply ko, pero nung click ko publish, ayun nawala!!!

So, I thought... I just blog about it... major tamad me magbasa kasi now with my tooth being a bitch and all... wa, masyado entry... and NO, I AM NOT GOING TO SEE A DENTIST!!! NO WAY!!! kasi sa kanila lang ako ngumanga ng di nasarapan!!! lolz

Yes, dentist, me no likey!!!

anyway, here is the comment... Page 29 of 366...

Okay, and I say... thank you if you find my blog informative and I must agree not fun to read though... may pagkaboring... scary at times... I know, try to make it fun... but I guess HIV/AIDS is not really a laughing matter... not a good material for comedy...

Anyhow, you have a handful of questions... your first question, I didn't associate my CD4 count to how long had I have the virus... well, back then I was not really thinking about it, as I was keeping my HIV status under wraps... I didn't want anyone to know including my parents who were there with me in the hospital... for them I was a TB patient, and that was because I smoke then and works on a graveyard shift... and so that was the story I was sticking with... no talks about HIV, it was noted on my files, the doctors can't even mention it...

And I don't think you can associate CD4 count, how low or how high it is, to how long have you been infected already... I'm not sure... would have to research on that and I think warrants another blog entry... all I know was that I don't get sick prior to this... although at the back of my mind... since I have an active, very promiscuous, sex life... I had the virus already for awhile that I started requiring wearing condoms, not afraid I will get infected but I might infect them...

I should have my CD4 last December... CD4 count should be checked every every 6 months but it cost 3000 pesos, I am a little tight on money, being jobless and all, so I have not taken another CD4 count yet...

Now with TB meds counter acting with ARV... I don't know about that, but I was admitted May 27, 2011 at RITM, my CD4 count that showed I only have 22, thus I am stage 4 AIDS, was out before June... I was confirmed with TB June 3, started TB meds immediately... was out of the hospital June 10... went back June 17 for check up... and it was only then did I start ARV treatment...

I was told though that I have to start TB meds first, treat TB first, before taking ARV... don't really understand that part...

Now basing on your questions, I assume you also tested positive with the virus... If you are, I must tell you, not really an expert on the subject... not even a good support person... but add me at twitter: @casuallypositiv and you would find that I am part of a PLHIV community and you are welcome to join in sa aming kulitan and if you need help or whatever... maraming handang tumulong...

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Page 29 of 366

8:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs, 24 left/8 days to go. ARV: zido/lami

my tooth's a bitch!!!

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

and it is bitching again!!!

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Page 28 of 366

8:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs, 27 left/9 days to go. ARV: zido/lami

tooth ache last night, 'til wee hours... ignored the 6 am alarm for the TB meds and went on to sleep... wise enough not to ignore the 8 am alarm...

Here are the key features of Republic Act 8504, otherwise known as "Philippine AIDS Prevention and Control Act of 1998"

Article I: Education and Information - Section 6: HIV/AIDS Education in the Workplace

  • All government and private employees shall be provided with standardized basic information and instruction on HIV and AIDS.
  • HIV / AIDS education shall be integrated into orientation, training, continuing education, HR dev’t programs, etc
  • Each employer shall develop, implement, evaluate and fund a workplace HIV and AIDS education and information program.
  • In collaboration with the DOH, DOLE shall oversee the anti-HIV/AIDS campaign in all private companies.

Article III: Testing, Screening and Counseling: 

  • Section 16: Prohibition on Compulsory HIV Testing

Compulsory HIV testing as a precondition to employment, admission to educational institutions, the provision of medical service or any kind of service shall be deemed unlawful.
Exceptions to Prohibition on Compulsory HIV Testing
  • When charged with crime under the Revised Penal Code, Death penalty Act, Anti-rape Law
  • When resolving issues relevant to the Family Code
  • When complying with requirements of organ or blood donation
  • Reportorial requirements
  • When informing health workers directly involved in treatment and care of persons with HIV/AIDS
  • When responding to legal proceedings where the main issue is the HIV status of a person

  • Section 18: Anonymous HIV Testing
  • Section 19: Accreditation of HIV Testing Centers
  • Section 20: Pre-test and Post-test Counselling

Article VI: Confidentiality

  • Section 30: Medical Confidentiality

All health professionals, medical instructors, workers, employers, recruitment agencies, insurance companies, data encoders, and other custodians of any  medical records, file, data or  test results to observe strict confidentiality particularly the identity and status of persons with HIV

Release of HIV/AIDS Test Results will only be allowed to the following parties:
  • Person who was tested
  • Parent of minor if minor
  • Legal guardian of mentally handicapped person
  • Person authorized to receive results for AIDSWATCH
  • Justice of Court of Appeals or Supreme Court
  • Section 34: Disclosure to Sexual Partners 

Any person with HIV is obliged to disclose his/her HIV status and health condition to his/her spouse or sexual partner at the earliest opportune time.

Article VII: Discriminatory Acts and Policies - Section 35: Workplace Discrimination

  • Discrimination in any form from preemployment to post-employment, including hiring, promotion or assignment, based on the actual, perceived or suspected HIV status of an individual is prohibited. Termination from work on the sole basis of actual, perceived or suspected HIV status is deemed unlawful.
  • Persons with HIV/AIDS already employed by any public or private company shall be entitled to the same
  • employment rights, benefits and opportunities as other employees.
  • HIV infected employees shall act responsibly to protect own health and prevent HIV transmission
  • Acts of discrimination shall be reported to DOLE or to CSC

Misleading information / advertising
2 months to 2 years imprisonment
Knowingly & negligently infecting others in the practice of one’s profession 
6-12 years imprisonment, fines, suspension or revocation of license/accreditation
Violations on medical confidentiality
6 months to 4 years imprisonment, fines, suspension or revocation of license/accreditation
Discriminatory acts & policies
6 months to 4 years imprisonment, fines of not over P10,000, revocation of license/permits

Mandate of the Philippine National AIDS Council
To be the central advisory, planning and policy-making body for the comprehensive and integrated HIV / AIDS prevention and control program in the Philippines.

Pantangal umay... dessert!!!

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

Friday, January 27, 2012

Page 27 of 366

6:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs. 30 tablets left, 10 days.
8:00 am: ARV: zido/lami

10 days before I go back to RITM, to DOTS... To what I understand, I would be doing a sputum test again... if it shows that I still have TB, then we are looking at Multi-Drug Resistant (MDR) TB... which would be much difficult to treat, I might be referred to Lung Center already...

I'm scared...

Note to self: I should also pay for my PhilHealth... as much as possible for at least 6 months... a full year would be great... but since money is still very tight... I guess would have to settle for just 3 months...

The TB med is 150mg/75mg tablet Rifampicin and Isoniazid.

Rifampicin was introduced in 1967, as a major addition to the cocktail-drug treatment of tuberculosis and inactive meningitis, along with isoniazid, ethambutol, pyrazinamide and streptomycin. It requires a prescription in North America. It must be administered regularly daily for several months without break; otherwise, the risk of drug-resistant tuberculosis is greatly increased. In fact, this is the primary reason that it is used in tandem with the three aforementioned drugs, particularly isoniazid. This is also the primary motivation behind directly observed therapy for tuberculosis.

Rifampicin resistance develops quickly during treatment and rifampicin monotherapy should not be used to treat these infections — it should be used in combination with other antibiotics.

Rifampicin is also used in the treatment of cholestatic pruritus.

Isoniazid (Laniazid, Nydrazid), also known as isonicotinylhydrazine (INH), is an organic compound that is the first-line anti tuberculosis medication in prevention and treatment. It was first discovered in 1912, and later in 1951 it was found to be effective against tuberculosis by inhibiting its mycolic acid (wax coat). Isoniazid is never used on its own to treat active tuberculosis because resistance quickly develops. Isoniazid also has an antidepressant effect, and it was one of the first antidepressants discovered. Isoniazid can also be used in the treatment of a BCG-oma.

The compound was first synthesised in the early 20th century, but its activity against tuberculosis was first reported in the early 1950s and three pharmaceutical companies attempted unsuccessfully to simultaneously patent the drug (the most prominent one being Roche, who launched their version, Rimifon, in 1952). With the introduction of isoniazid, a cure for tuberculosis was first considered reasonable.

Isoniazid is available in tablet, syrup, and injectable forms (given intramuscularly or intravenously). Isoniazid is available worldwide, is inexpensive and is generally well tolerated. It is manufactured from isonicotinic acid, which is produced from 4-methylpyridine.

One of the adverse side effect of Isoniazid is Peripheral Neuropathy, which I am suffering from right now. It is due to pyridoxine (vitamin B6) depletion, but are uncommon at doses of 5 mg/kg. Persons with conditions in which neuropathy is common (e.g., diabetes, uremia, alcoholism, malnutrition, HIV-infection), as well as pregnant women and persons with a seizure disorder, may be given pyridoxine (vitamin B6) (10–50 mg/day) with isoniazid.

My ARV Cocktail includes: Zidovudine and Lamivudine, combined in one tablet, taken at 8 in the morning and again 8 in the evening, this time with Efavirenz.

Zidovudine (INN) or azidothymidine (AZT) (also called ZDV) is a nucleoside analog reverse-transcriptase inhibitor (NRTI).

AZT was the first approved treatment for HIV, sold under the names Retrovir and Retrovis. AZT use was a major breakthrough in AIDS therapy in the 1990s that significantly altered the course of the illness and helped destroy the notion that HIV/AIDS was a death sentence. AZT slows HIV spread significantly, but does not stop it entirely. This allows HIV to become AZT-resistant over time, and for this reason AZT is usually used in conjunction with other NRTIs and anti-viral drugs. In this form, AZT is used as an ingredient in Combivir and Trizivir, among others. Zidovudine is included in the World Health Organization's "Essential Drugs List", which is a list of minimum medical needs for a basic health care system.

AZT works by inhibiting the action of reverse transcriptase, the enzyme that HIV uses to make a DNA copy of its RNA. Reverse transcription is necessary for production of the viral double-stranded DNA, which is subsequently integrated into the genetic material of the infected cell (where it is called a provirus).

The azido group increases the lipophilic nature of AZT, allowing it to cross cell membranes easily by diffusion and thereby also to cross the blood-brain barrier. Cellular enzymes convert AZT into the effective 5'-triphosphate form. Studies have shown that the termination of the formed DNA chains is the specific factor in the inhibitory effect.

The triphosphate form also inhibits DNA polymerase used by human cells to undergo cell division, but has approximately 100-fold greater affinity for viral reverse transcriptase. Because of this selectivity, in vitro studies have shown that AZT inhibits HIV replication without affecting the function of normal T cells. The cellular DNA polymerase used by mitochondria to replicate is more sensitive to the inhibitory effects of AZT, accounting for its toxic effects on cardiac and skeletal muscles, causing myositis.

Chronic, high-dose therapy with AZT is associated with significant side effects, including anemia, neutropenia, hepatotoxicity, cardiomyopathy, and myopathy. Damage to muscle cells is reversible upon cessation of AZT treatment. It has been attributed to several possible causes including depletion of mitochondrial DNA, sensitivity of the γ-DNA polymerase in the cell mitochondria, the depletion of thymidine triphosphate, oxidative stress, reduction of intracellular L-carnitine or apoptosis of the muscle cells. Anemia due to AZT can be treated using erythropoietin to stimulate red blood cell production. Drugs that inhibit hepatic glucuronidation, such as indomethacin, acetylsalicylic acid (Aspirin) and trimethoprim, decrease the elimination rate and increase the toxicity of the drug. Minor side effects include nausea and vomiting, headache, changes in the distribution of body fat, sleep disruption and loss of appetite while less common but potentially serious side effects include discoloration of fingernails and toenails, mood changes, tingling or numbness of the hands or feet, easy bruising or bleeding and seizures. Serious allergic reactions are rare.

Lamivudine (2',3'-dideoxy-3'-thiacytidine, commonly called 3TC) is a potent nucleoside analog reverse transcriptase inhibitor (nRTI).

Lamivudine has been used for treatment of chronic hepatitis B at a lower dose than for treatment of HIV. It improves the seroconversion of e-antigen positive hepatitis B and also improves histology staging of the liver. Long term use of lamivudine unfortunately leads to emergence of a resistant hepatitis B virus (YMDD) mutant. Despite this, lamivudine is still used widely as it is well tolerated.

Lamivudine is an analogue of cytidine. It can inhibit both types (1 and 2) of HIV reverse transcriptase and also the reverse transcriptase of hepatitis B. It is phosphorylated to active metabolites that compete for incorporation into viral DNA. They inhibit the HIV reverse transcriptase enzyme competitively and act as a chain terminator of DNA synthesis. The lack of a 3'-OH group in the incorporated nucleoside analogue prevents the formation of the 5' to 3' phosphodiester linkage essential for DNA chain elongation, and therefore, the viral DNA growth is terminated.

Lamivudine is administered orally, and it is rapidly absorbed with a bio-availability of over 80%. Some research suggests that lamivudine can cross the blood-brain barrier. Lamivudine is often given in combination with zidovudine, with which it is highly synergistic. Lamivudine treatment has been shown to restore zidovudine sensitivity of previously resistant HIV. Lamivudine showed no evidence of carcinogenicity or mutagenicity in in vivo studies in mice and rats at doses from 10 to 58 times those used in humans

Efavirenz is used to treat HIV infection. It is never used alone and is always given in combination with other drugs. The decision on when to start treatment should take into account CD4 count, HIV viral load, treatment history, resistance profiles and patient preference.

Since the preliminary publication of the results of the ACTG 5142 trial in 2006 which compared efavirenz against lopinavir, efavirenz has been used as first line treatment in preference to the protease inhibitors. The ACTG 5095 trial showed that the potency of efavirenz is maintained at all CD4 counts and HIV viral loads.

Efavirenz falls in the NNRTI class of antiretrovirals. Both nucleoside and non-nucleoside RTIs inhibit the same target, the reverse transcriptase enzyme, an essential viral enzyme which transcribes viral RNA into DNA. Unlike nucleoside RTIs, which bind at the enzyme's active site, NNRTIs act allosterically by binding to a distinct site away from the active site known as the NNRTI pocket.

Efavirenz is not effective against HIV-2, as the pocket of the HIV-2 reverse transcriptase has a different structure, which confers intrinsic resistance to the NNRTI class.

As most NNRTIs bind within the same pocket, viral strains which are resistant to efavirenz are usually also resistant to the other NNRTIs, nevirapine and delavirdine. The most common mutation observed after efavirenz treatment is K103N, which is also observed with other NNRTIs

Side effects may include Psychiatric symptoms, including insomnia, nightmares, confusion, memory loss, and depression, are common, and more serious symptoms such as psychosis may occur in patients with compromised liver or kidney function.

Rash, nausea, dizziness and headache may occur

A general guideline about efavirenz and pregnancy states that efavirenz can cause birth defects and should not be used in women who might become pregnant. A later study, however, found no increased risk of overall birth defects among women exposed to efavirenz during the first trimester of pregnancy compared with exposure to other antiretroviral drugs. 

Safety in children has not been established

Use of efavirenz can produce a false positive result in some urine tests for marijuana.

Plus, I take a prophylaxis: Co-trimoxazole.

Trimethoprim/sulfamethoxazole or co-trimoxazole (abbreviated SXT, TMP-SMX, TMP-SMZ or TMP-sulfa) is a sulfonamide antibiotic combination of trimethoprim and sulfamethoxazole, in the ratio of 1 to 5, used in the treatment of a variety of bacterial infections.

The synergy between trimethoprim and sulfamethoxazole was first described in a series of in vitro and in vivo experiments published in the late 1960s. Trimethoprim and sulfamethoxazole have a greater effect when given together than when given separately; the reason is because they inhibit successive steps in the folate synthesis pathway.

It is unclear whether this synergy occurs at doses used in humans, because, at the concentrations seen in blood and tissues, the ratio of trimethoprim to sulfamethoxazole is 1:20, which is less than the 1:5 ratio needed in vitro for synergy to occur.

Sulfamethoxazole acts as a false-substrate inhibitor of dihydropteroate synthetase. Sulfonamides such as sulfamethoxazole are analogues of p-aminobenzoic acid (PABA) and, thus, are competitive inhibitors of the enzyme, inhibiting the production of dihydropteroic acid.
Trimethoprim acts by interfering with the action of bacterial dihydrofolate reductase, inhibiting synthesis of tetrahydrofolic acid.

Folic acid is an essential precursor in the de novo synthesis of the DNA nucleosides thymidine and uridine. Bacteria are unable to take up folic acid from the environment (i.e., the infection host) and, thus, are dependent on their own de novo synthesis - inhibition of the enzyme starves the bacteria of two bases necessary for DNA replication and transcription.

Trimethoprim/sulfamethoxazole may have the following adverse reactions:
  • Allergic – Stevens–Johnson syndrome, toxic epidermal necrolysis, anaphylaxis, allergic myocarditis, erythema multiforme, exfoliative dermatitis, angiodema, drug fever, chills, Henoch–Schönlein purpura, serum sickness-like syndrome, generalized allergic reactions, generalized skin eruptions, photosensitivity, conjunctival and scleral injection, pruritus, urticaria and rash. In addition, periarteritis nodosa and systemic lupus erythematosis have been reported.
  • Endocrine – The sulfonamides bear certain chemical similarities to some goitrogens, diuretics (acetazolamide and the thiazides), and oral hypoglycemic agents. Cross-sensitivity may exist with these agents. Diuresis and hypoglycemia have occurred rarely in patients receiving sulfonamides.
  • Gastrointestinal – Hepatitis, including cholestatic jaundice and hepatic necrosis, elevation of serum transaminase and bilirubin, pseudo-membranous enterocolitis, pancreatitis, stomatitis, glossitis, nausea, emesis, abdominal pain, diarrhea, anorexia.
  • Genitourinary – Renal failure, interstitial nephritis, BUN and serum creatinine elevation, toxic nephrosis with oliguria and anuria, and crystalluria.
  • Hematologic – Agranulocytosis, aplastic anemia, thrombocytopenia, leukopenia, neutropenia, hemolytic anemia, megaloblastic anemia, hypoprothrominemia, methemoglobinemia, eosinophilia.
  • Metabolic – Hyperkalemia, hyponatremia.
  • Musculoskeletal – Arthralgia and myalgia.
  • Neurologic – Aseptic meningitis, convulsions, peripheral neuritis, ataxia, vertigo, tinnitus, headache.
  • Psychiatric – Hallucinations, depression, apathy, nervousness.
  • Respiratory System – Cough, shortness of breath, and pulmonary infiltrates.
  • Miscellaneous – Weakness, fatigue, insomnia.

***hot guy on pic have no connect to the article, pantangal umay lang kasi ang haba eh... lolz

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Page 26 of 366

6:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs. 33 tablets left, 11 days.
8:00 am: ARV: zido/lami

List of significant HIV related films:


Andrew Beckett (Tom Hanks) is a senior associate at the largest corporate law firm in Philadelphia. Although he lives with his partner Miguel Álvarez (Antonio Banderas), Beckett is not open about his homosexuality at the law firm, nor the fact that he is HIV positive. On the day he is assigned the firm's newest and most important case, one of the firm's partners notices a small lesion on Beckett's forehead. Shortly thereafter, Beckett stays home from work for several days to try to find a way to hide his lesions. While at home, he finishes the complaint for the case he has been assigned and then brings it to his office, leaving instructions for his assistants to file the complaint in court on the following day, which marks the end of the statute of limitations for the case. Beckett suffers from bowel spasms at home and is rushed to the hospital. Later that morning, while still at the ER, he receives a frantic call from the firm asking for the complaint, as the paper copy cannot be found and there are no copies on the computer's hard drive. However, the complaint is finally discovered and is filed with the court at the last possible moment. The following day, Beckett is dismissed by the firm's partners, who had previously referred to him as their "buddy", but now question his professional abilities in light of the misplaced document.

Beckett believes that someone deliberately hid his paperwork to give the firm a pretext to fire him, and that the firing is actually as a result of his diagnosis with AIDS. He asks several attorneys to take his case, including personal injury lawyer Joe Miller (Denzel Washington), with whom he had been involved in a previous case. Miller, who is admittedly homophobic and knows little about Beckett's AIDS, initially declines to take the case and immediately visits his doctor to find out if he could have contracted the AIDS through shaking Beckett's hand. The doctor explains the methods of HIV infection. The doctor then offers to take a sample of Miller's blood, suspecting that Miller was asking about AIDS because he suspected he had contracted it and was trying to hide it. Miller dismisses the request by laughing it off, thinking it a joke. Unable to find a lawyer willing to represent him, Beckett is compelled to act as his own attorney. While researching a case at a law library, Miller sees Beckett at a nearby table. After a librarian announces that he has found a book on AIDS discrimination for Beckett, others in the library begin to first stare and then move away, and the librarian suggests Beckett retire to a private room. Disgusted by their behavior, Miller approaches Beckett and reviews the material he has gathered. It is obvious he has decided to take the case. Upon receiving a summons by Miller, the head of the firm, Charles Wheeler (Jason Robards), worries about the damage the lawsuit could do to his business and reputation, although one partner (Ron Vawter) unsuccessfully tries to convince them to settle out of court with Beckett.

As the case goes before the court, Wheeler takes the stand, claiming that Beckett was incompetent and claiming that he had deliberately tried to hide his condition. The defense repeatedly suggests that Beckett had invited his illness through promiscuity and was therefore not a victim. In the course of testimony, it is revealed that the partner who had noticed Beckett's lesion had previously worked with a woman who had contracted AIDS after a blood transfusion and so would have recognized the lesion as relating to AIDS. To prove that the lesions would have been visible, Miller asks Beckett to unbutton his shirt while on the witness stand, revealing that his lesions were indeed visible and recognizable as such.

During cross-examination, Beckett admits that he was originally planning to tell his law colleagues that he was gay, but changed his mind after hearing them make homophobic jokes in the sauna of a health club. When asked about the truth of how he got infected, he confirms that he engaged in anonymous sex with another man at a pornographic movie theater. However, he and Miller gain an advantage when the partner who advised settling out of court confesses he long suspected Beckett had AIDS but never said anything, and how he regrets his inaction.

Beckett collapses during Wheeler's testimony. During his hospitalization, the jury votes in his favor, awarding him back pay, damages for pain and suffering, and punitive damages totaling nearly $4.5M. Miller visits Beckett in the hospital after the verdict and overcomes his fear enough to touch Beckett's face. After Beckett's family leaves the room, he tells Miguel that he is ready to die. A short scene immediately afterward shows Miller getting the word that Beckett has died. The movie ends with a reception at Beckett's home following the funeral, where many mourners, including the Millers, view home movies of Beckett as a healthy child.

Angels In America
It is 1985: Ronald Reagan is in the White House, and Death swings the quiet scythe of AIDS across the nation. In Manhattan, Prior Walter tells Lou, his lover of four years, that he has AIDS; Lou, unable to handle it, leaves him. As disease and loneliness ravage Prior, guilt invades Lou. Joe Pitt, an attorney who is Mormon and Republican, is pushed by right-wing fixer Roy Cohn toward a job at the United States Department of Justice. Both Pitt and Cohn are in the closet: Pitt out of shame and religious turmoil, Cohn to preserve his power and image. Pitt's wife Harper is strung out on Valium, causing her to hallucinate constantly (sometimes jointly with Prior during his fever dreams), and she longs to escape from her sexless marriage. An angel with ulterior motives commands Prior to become a prophet. Pitt's mother and Belize, a close friend, help Prior choose. Joe leaves his wife and goes to live with Lou, but the relationship doesn't work out due to ideological differences. Roy is diagnosed with AIDS early on, and as his life comes to a close he is haunted by the ghost of Ethel Rosenberg.

As the film continues, these lost souls come together to create bonds of love, loss, and loneliness and, in the end, discover forgiveness and overcome abandonment

Longtime Companion

Longtime Companion chronicles the first years of the AIDS epidemic as seen through its impact on several gay men and the straight female sister of one of them. The film is split into several sections identified by dates.

July 3, 1981
Willy (Campbell Scott) a personal trainer, and his friend John (Dermot Mulroney) are spending time with affluent gay couple David (Bruce Davison) and Sean (Mark Lamos) at their beach house on Fire Island for the 4th of July. Sean is a screenwriter for the popular daytime soap opera Other People and David comes from a blue blood background and has a large trust fund. Back in the city, Howard (Patrick Cassidy) is preparing to audition for Sean's soap. His boyfriend is Paul (John Dossett) a business executive and their next-door neighbor is Lisa (Parker), whose friend Fuzzy (Stephen Caffrey), is a lawyer who represents Howard.
That morning, The New York Times publishes its first article about the rise of a new "gay cancer." The news spreads as friends call each other. Some are immediately concerned, others dismissive. Willy meets Fuzzy at a tea dance later in the afternoon and they begin a relationship. Howard lands the role.

April 30, 1982
John is the first among the group to be diagnosed with the new disease, contracting pneumonia. Howard is given script pages in which his character is slated to become the first openly gay character on daytime television. He's very concerned about typecasting, fearing that by playing gay he won't be offered other sorts of parts. Willy and Fuzzy move in together.
John dies shortly after his admission to the hospital.

June 17, 1983
Willy, Fuzzy, Lisa, David and Sean gather back on Fire Island with friends Michael and Bob to watch Howard's character come out on the soap opera. The group also discuss a sick neighbor who has become a pariah on the island. That evening, Sean and David argue over Sean's fears that he might be getting sick.

September 7, 1984
Paul is hospitalized with toxoplasmosis. Sean is also hospitalized. Willy visits Sean and is so terrified of becoming infected that he dons a surgical mask and protective gown and, when Sean kisses him on the neck, excuses himself to the bathroom to scrub the spot. Michael is also visiting Sean, bringing with him homeopathic preparations and a book by Louise Hay. Howard visits Paul and breaks down sobbing. Paul tries to reassure and comfort him.

March 22, 1985
Sean has deteriorated to the point of dementia. David is helping with his writing and deceiving the studio into thinking that Sean is still able to work. Fuzzy tries to get Howard a movie role but the producer refuses to cast him because of the rumor that he has AIDS. Paul is back in the hospital following a seizure. David takes Sean for a walk but has to take him home when Sean urinates in a fountain. That night Willy catches Fuzzy checking himself for swollen glands and they talk about their fear of dying. "What do you think happens when we die?" Fuzzy asks. "We get to have sex again" is Willy's reply.

January 4, 1986
Sean has deteriorated to the point of near-catatonia and is in constant pain. He has to be strapped into his bed and has lost control of his bowels and bladder and has to wear adult diapers as a result. After sending Sean's nurse on an errand, David sits with Sean and tells him that it's all right to let go, to stop fighting to stay alive. Sean dies. Willy and Lisa come by to help David and they pick out a suit for Sean to wear to be cremated. Fuzzy calls Gay Men's Health Crisis to find a funeral home. In a rare moment of levity, Lisa and Willy stumble across a slinky red dress in Sean's closet and consider giving it to the undertaker. "What could they say", asks Willy, "if we said we knew him and we knew that's the way he wanted to be remembered?" Ultimately they decide against it, since "it needs a hat. A big Bea Lillie thing!"
The four go to a Chinese restaurant to write Sean's obituary and include David as his "longtime companion."

May 16, 1987
David has died and this is the day of his memorial service. Bob and Willy eulogize him.

September 10, 1988
Fuzzy and Lisa are volunteering answering phones at GMHC. Willy is a "buddy" to a GMHC client, Alberto.
Howard has been diagnosed as being HIV positive. Although it's not mentioned, the presumption is that Paul has died. Howard exploits his remaining fame as a former soap opera star to raise money for AIDS causes by hosting a benefit which includes a performance by Finger Lakes Trio of the Village People song "YMCA" performed in a pastiche of chamber music style.

July 19, 1989
Willy, Fuzzy and Lisa walk along the beach. While it is again unstated, the presumption is that Howard has died. They talk about an upcoming ACT UP demonstration. They talk about remembering a time before AIDS and wonder about finding a cure. The film ends with a momentary fantasy sequence, with the friends and others lost to AIDS appearing with them on the beach, before they vanish again and the three are left to walk off the deserted beach while the song "Post-Mortem Bar", by Zane Campbell, plays on the soundtrack.

A Mother's Prayer
Rosemary Holmstrom is struggling to bring up her son following the death of her husband. When she is diagnosed with AIDS, at first she refuses to believe it, but soon turns her attentions to the problem of what will happen to her son when she dies.

And the Band Played On

An engrossing adaptation of Randy Shilts' landmark prize-winning document on the onset of AIDS and the fevered manhunt to find the cause and cure of the HIV virus. Compelling storytelling and a remarkable performance by Modine as the head for the Centers for Disease Control facing impossible odds and heartbreaking frustrations. Hallmark for cameo appearances and political correctness it may be but stirring and revelatory nonetheless. Dare not to be moved during Elton John's "The Last Song" as images and names of the disease's victims roll during the closing credits. Directed by Roger Spottiswoode for HBO.

Life and Death on the A-list

A heart-wrenching documentary about Tom McBride's (who some people will remember as the wheelchair bound jock in Friday The 13th: Part 2) life, his fight with AIDS and his death.

A modern spin on the opera LA BOHEME, RENT tells the story of eight friends dealing with life and love in Manhattan's Alphabet City in 1989. Over the course of a year, the friends face poverty, drug addiction, break-ups, reconciliations, eviction, and AIDS. Despite these challenges, they find support, hope, and acceptance in each other, all the while embracing the bohemian lifestyle that was so much a part of the Lower East Side.

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Page 25 of 366

6:00 am: TB meds, 3 tabs. 36 tablets left, 12 days.
8:00 am: arv: zido/lami

I went crazy last night... it's this blasted tooth ache... I am afraid of dentist... I'll tell you that much... but even if I am not, it is aching already, no, dentist is going to operate on it... and that I am hypertensive, I would need clearance from a doctor first before they would perform extraction...

Well, you know how painful it is when your tooth aches... and I just can't help but think, I am suffering way to much already... from neuropathy to tb, to throwing up in the morning... to feeling weak and tired... and now this... why?!? Other possies are not suffering as much as I am... the neuropathy alone, I am having a hard time holding up to it... 

It drove me crazy... you have no idea...

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Page 24 of 366

6:00 am: TB meds
8:00 am: arv: zido/lami

HIV promotes a strong and destructive Pro-oxidant state within the body.  This Oxidative state produces stress that can damage cells and tissue in the body.  Since we are on the subject of nutrition, I should mention a food that can help.  Grapes!  Grapes not only have a full assortment of nutritional value, including; Vitamins B12 and C, Selenium, Zinc and Resveratrol, as well as much more.  But it also acts as a powerful Antioxidant, thus reducing cell and tissue damage.  In-fact to illustrate some of the power of grapes, there is something called the French Paradox.  Researchers have found that the French regularly eat more animal fat, which has been linked to greater chances of disease, such as Heart Disease.  The Paradox comes in when the French maintain a low incidence of Heart Disease.  This is primarily believed to be due to their high consumption of red wine and the Resveratrol in it.  Resveratrol is currently being researched as alternative treatments for cancer and HIV for its potent qualities.  It is believed to work by halting both cancer and HIV from progressing and replicating, and even is believed to induce cell death within cancer cells.

Back in the 1920’s, Johanna Brandt, an immigrant from South Africa, developed what she called, a cure, derived from grapes.  It was shortly titled, the Brandt Grape Cure, and it was believe to cure both cancer and reverse HIV, through it potent Antioxidant, detoxifying and nutritional properties.  Though the cure has been ridiculed as being a hoax, it is only now that some of the many properties of grapes are getting a second look, as we are discovering some of its potential in the area of fighting diseases.   This treatment starts off by cutting all other foods from your diet before going on a 12 hour water fast.  After 12 hours, you casually consume grapes (preferably concord or purple grapes, with the skin and seeds intact) over the next 12 hours as well as your drinking water accordingly.  Afterwards, you start the process over again until healthy.

The theory is, the fasting puts your body into a more starved state as well as the infected cells, then when you eat the grapes, the disease fighting qualities of the grapes are what the diseases themselves get instead.  It is important to note that the skin and seeds should be intact and the grapes themselves, fresh and unprocessed, as that’s where a majority of these nutrients come from.

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. Prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

Monday, January 23, 2012

Page 23 of 366

6:00 am: tb meds, 3 tabs
8:00 am: arv: zido/lami

Tooth ache...

It cause me to breakdown... well, I have fear of dentist... and that I am suffering from neuropathy, I have TB... and now this... like com'on...! Tipong andami ko na sakit... yung ibang pos naman di ganito... they are living a normal life... ako, ito... as if I am not suffering enough, sumakit ngipin ko... alam niyo yung, ano bang napakalaking kasalanan ang nagawa ko at pinaparusahan ako ng ganito...?

Of course, I didn't get answers... and that I had no choice but to wipe my tears a way, kasi gusto ko pang panoorin yung part 2 ng Resident Evil... at nagpabili ako ng bacon kay brother at bumili naman siya...

8:00 pm: arv: zido/lami, efav. Prophylaxis: Cotrimoxazole

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